One morning early, Over seven years ago, the LORD spoke to me and said: A woman cannot initiate a bill of divorcement. Once they are married, she is his, forever. The word , forever, echoed over and over until it could no longer be heard. I stared into the darkness, pondering a reason for this inflection from the LORD. The Bible rarely speaks of a women’s choices and responsibility in marriage. Even in their very creation, in Genesis_5:2, the LORD simply said “And the LORD called them Adam”. Later the scripture would say;

And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband: But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife. 1Corinthians_7:10 & 11 ,

( to say nothing of her divorcing him) In this New Testament scripture it is easy to see the value of the vow that is to be taken in marriage. In the Old Testament, a husband could even disallow a woman’s vow to the LORD. She is to be in submission to their own husbands in the old and New Testament. How is making a decision to end a covenant with a man considered in submission. This relationship of marriage is not exactly equal. It is a King with his Queen. She does not put him away, but Queen Vasthti could be put away by King Ahauerus, in the Book of Esther. Jesus would later say, that the decision to break a marriage covenant by a man could only be done for one reason, and one reason only which was infidelity. Mat 19:5 And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh?Mat 19:6 Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.Mat 19:7 They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away?Mat 19:8 He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so.Mat 19:9 And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.Mat 19:10 His disciples say unto him, If the case of the man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry. Shortly afterward this message, I received a book in the mail that was an autobiography of a Christian woman who felt taken advantage of by her husband’s leadership. After a struggle, she filed for divorce. She not only broke up her home, but during the divorce process, she aided in breaking up the home of a man she committed adultery with and later married. How can a woman divorce a man when Jesus said: Mark_10:11 And he saith unto them, Whosoever shall put away his wife, and marry another, committeth adultery against her.Mar_10:12 And if a woman shall put away her husband, and be married to another, she committeth adultery. Marriage was meant as a gift from the LORD to grant the beauty of a love affair and the two becoming one. It is meant to symbolize the loyalty enjoyed, and to be experienced in our relationship with the LORD as Adam had in the very beginning. This union was so important that not only did the LORD say that the man should not be alone but that he would actually use one of his body’s inner members to bring a lifelong companion for him. She is to be forever at his side, just as his rib had been. Many people confuse falling out of love with anger or a lack of forgiving their spouse. True love is meant to last forever, but this forever can be clouded by bitterness and a lack of forgiveness toward one’s spouse.. This is why after many a divorce, and emotions subside, the plaintiff that filed for the divorce, often regrets their actions. Jesus Christ gave us only one reason to dissolve a marriage and that is adultery. If we spend more time in prayer, understanding and forgiveness as well as trying to please our spouse instead of seeking for our pleasure, the ungodly horror of divorce would began to diminish in our society. It works both ways. If we stop inundating our minds with the ways of the world and its pleasures, the divorce rate in the church would not mirror that of the world. A family that prays together can stay together and cast out the ungodly spirits of discord in the home . If the enemy has a strangle hold on something or someone in your life, remember Jesus said; Mark_9:29 And he said unto them, This kind can come forth by nothing, but by prayer and fasting. Marriage was instituted and created by God and from God to mankind, beginning with Adam and Eve in the garden. He made the statement that man should not be alone. There was found a mate for all the animals in the garden, but not for Adam. Marriage was conceived as an expression of love not surprising, since God is a being of love. It was the embracing into a sphere where once had be loneliness, into a Godly companionship. In His creation of the institution of marriage, was the expectancy of someone returning, or coming back again after a parting from the sight of love. In it the truth and unity. LORD created a wholeness, just as in Adam was created a need for the other after Eve was separated from Adam by the creation of woman from a rib bone. Marriage was given prior to the falling of man into sin. Therefore it was not a time that would have brought so much regret, but it is the sin that enters into marriage that brings the regret. Because of sin, this union of love has to become one of forgiveness and understanding, of serving the other as we would want to be served, and of love that last until the end of life. It is the will of God for us to strive for this marriage, because the vow was made before Him, and He says that if any make a vow, they shall surely keep it. What ever other problems that we have, must be committed to the lord in prayer, and often with fasting to win the battle in which satan plans to defeat us. Malachi 2:16 “I hate divorce,” says the God of Israel. God-of-the-Angel-Armies says, “I hate the violent dismembering of the ‘one flesh’ of marriage.” So watch yourselves. Don’t let your guard down. Don’t cheat. Be very sure, if you think the LORD approves your separation or divorce, because God hates divorce. Ephesians_5:31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.

Don’t ask for counsel from friends and family who are on your side. Ask for counsel from those who are on the side of your marriage.

Your spouse is not perfect, everyone is selfish in some way or another. Often the fault we see in our spouse is the imperfection that is also found in us. Take a time to separate for fasting and prayer. Don’t allow any, including yourselves to put your marriage asunder.

Check yourself, you will always find there is need for repentance. Take the next step higher.

A married couple should not war, they should stand on both sides of a line seeking the same purpose. They should maintain self control in decisions and pray. Resist the urge to criticize each others preferences. Give in. In prayer, the LORD will provide the right way. THE FAMILY THAT PRAYS TOGETHER, CAN STAY TOGETHER. God Bless your homes with solidarity,Let’s beat the odds. We can love each other better than the world can, because we have the Spirit of Love within us. We can live in love.

Keep it together. Be strong, it takes effort.